THINGS ONLY A MOM CAN TEACH

This is for our lovely moms who we love, loathe & admire - all at the same time.....& we just can do without them.

Each one of the below is a masterpeice, n it really reminds me of all that she said.. I enjoyed it thoroughly & I hope you enjoy it too......

My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION : Just wait until your father gets home.
My Mother taught me about RECEIVING:. You are going to get it when we get home!
My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE: What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you... Dont talk back to me!
My Mother taught me LOGIC:Because I said so, thats why. & If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, youre not going to The store with me.
My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE :If you dont stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.
My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD:If you dont pass your spelling test, youll never get a good job.
My Mother taught me ESP:Put your sweater on - dont you think I know when youre cold?
My Mother taught me HUMOR:When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, dont come running to me.
My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:If you dont eat your vegetables, youll never grow up.
My Mother taught me about SEX:How do you think you got here?
My Mother taught me about GENETICS:Youre just like your father.
My Mother taught me about my ROOTS: Do you think you were born in a barn?
My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE: When you get to be my age, you will understand.
My Mother taught me about JUSTICE: One day youll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then youll see what its like.
My mother taught me RELIGION: You better pray that will come out of the carpet.
My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: If you dont straighten up, Im going to knock you into the middle of next week!
My mother taught me FORESIGHT: Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case youre in an accident.
My mother taught me IRONY: Keep crying and Ill give you something to cry about.
My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS : Shut your mouth and eat your supper!
My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM: Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!
My mother taught me about STAMINA: Youll sit there until all that spinach is finished.
My mother taught me about WEATHER: It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.
My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS: If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?
My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY: If Ive told you once, Ive told you a million times - Don't Exaggerate!!!
My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE: I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION: Stop acting like your father!
My mother taught me about ENVY: There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who dont have wonderful parents like you do!